Speak Stiltedly and Wear a Yellow Shirt

It’s that time of year and everybody knows the meme:

1. Sleep (for the muse)
2. Write 1,000 words a day
3. Get published (for money)
4. Finish revising Colony
5. Make serious inroads into the Seven Saga
6. Do all those little things I keep putting off, like the sewing and the cleaning
7. Reclaim a hobby lost to writing (I’m thinking cross-stitch)
8. Work 9 to 5 instead of 10 to 6 (or get laid off)
9. Use my health insurance before I get laid off

That’s a lot of new leaves to turn over, but if you don’t make resolutions, you’ll never break any. The depressing ones at the end are in honor of the worst December stock market showings since 1931.