Speak Stiltedly and Wear a Yellow Shirt

Jade’s drabble Sands of Decision
and Picnic Prize-winning story A Moment of
Clarity are up.

Also, for your reading pleasure, a preliminary filk from my forthcoming filk
musical, The Sound of Borgness:

Filk:      Drone Seven
Original:  (How Do You Solve a Problem Like) Maria
Codes:     Borg Queen, drones, pre-Scorpion
Date:      August 26, 2002

   Two of Nine:
She rushes round
With such a sound -
She never takes the stair.

   Three of Nine:
She leaks when she assimilates
And all the new drones stare.

   Two of Nine:
And underneath her armor
She has mammaries to spare!

   Three of Nine:
Drone Seven doesn't fit in the Collective.

   Two of Nine:
She's early for her duties,

   Four of Nine:
But she does them like a drone.

   Two of Nine:
She's leaves us still regenerating
And does our work alone.

   Borg Queen:
It's time to put Our foot down -
All the evidence has shown

   Two and Three of Nine:
Drone Seven doesn't fit in the Collective.

   Four of Nine:
We could have ended like the other five;
But Seven saved our lives!

   Three of Nine:
How do you solve a problem like drone Seven?

   Borg Queen:
How do you reassimilate a drone?

   Four of Nine:
How do you find a role that fits drone Seven?

   Two of Nine:
A manifold scrubber!

   Three of Nine:
A sonambulist!

   Four of Nine:
A Queen!

   Borg Queen:
Many a thing she feels she ought to tell you,
Many a thing she tries to organize...

   Four of Nine:
But how can you make her stay
And do it proper Borg way?

   Borg Queen:
How do you cut her ego down to size?

   Four of Nine:
Oh, how do you solve a problem like drone Seven?

   Borg Queen:
What can you tell a drone who thinks she's wise?

   Four of Nine:
When I'm with her I'm unused
Out of contact and bemused,
Yet she makes me proud to think that I am Borg.

   Three of Nine:
Unpredictable as humans,
Independent like her parents.

   Four of Nine:
She's a good drone,

   Two of Nine:
She's a misfit.

   Four of Nine:
She is Borg.

   Three of Nine:
She'd out-pester any pest,
Drive a Horta from her nest,

   Two of Nine:
She could throw an old Hirogen
Off the trail.

   Four of Nine:
She's efficient,
She's precise,

   Three of Nine:
She's a nuisance.

   Four of Nine:
She's all right.

   Two of Nine:
She's a rebel!

   Four of Nine:
She's perfection!

   Borg Queen:
She's a girl.

   All:
How do you solve a problem like drone Seven?
How do you reassimilate a drone?
How do you find a role that fits drone Seven?
A manifold scrubber!
A sonambulist!
A Queen!

Many a thing she feels she ought to tell you,
Many a thing she tries to organize...
But how can you make her stay
And do it proper Borg way?
How do you cut her ego down to size?

Oh, how do you solve a problem like drone Seven?
What can you tell a drone who thinks she's wise?

This entry was posted on Tuesday, August 27th, 2002 at 11:27 pm and is filed under Filk. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.